Mother's Day for Me.
I would prefer to write some sappy post about how grateful I am to be the mother to these three amazing kids and how much wisdom that I have gained through mothering them, but that wouldn't be my entire truth today. Because Mother's Day as a single mom isn't my favorite holiday. It's like a big, fat glaring reminder that I lead this journey alone. This year wasn't any different. In fact, I really wanted to run away. But since that wasn't a viable option, instead, I hid in my closet and cried.
Unfortunately, Rumi found me. Sobbing. She asked me what was wrong...I didn't know what to say. Mostly because I didn't really know how to express with words the pains of being alone. Or how to explain to her my fears of managing and maintaining my own needs without compromising the needs of my children. So I told her that sometimes you simply cry because things can't always be the way you want them to be. And that although crying isn't going to change the situation, that sometimes through the trickling tears, you get to see a rainbow. And it helps you remember that the sun is still shining.
Then I got up off the floor. And I dried my tears. And I returned to my selfless job. The job that belongs only to me.
The Mother. Their Mother.